WE HAVE YOUR KIDNAPPED SHEEP! HMM, CAN I SMELL MINT SAUCE?

[mandy]

Shrewsbury Town Football Club supporters kidnap rival football club fans mascot "Myfanwy the Sheep" and auction her on eBay

WE HAVE YOUR SHEEP

HMM, CAN I SMELL MINT SAUCE?

Myfanwy is now our hostage and will be kept safe, even though the geneva convention does not cover livestock.

We are demanding a ransom for our hostage to be equally distributed between the town fans who drove ALL THE WAY to flippin' carlisle only to be told the match was off.

CHECK THE WEATHER FORECASTS!!!!!!!!!!

DON'T LIE TO US THAT THERE'S A CHANCE THE GAME COULD BE ON!!!!

Copy and paste this if you don't think we are serious...

http://www.yell.com/ucs/UcsSearchAction.do;jsessionid=d9fMHg-sps5a?searchType=classic&ooa=on&keywords=butchers&companyName=&location=shrewsbury&x=0&y=0

Salop's very own hostage takers can be found on www.blueandamber.com

On 17-Jan-06 at 23:26:57 GMT, seller added the following information:

Myfanwy could be anywhere in the world by now so don't even think of tracking her down! (Dummy model has been used in photos so FBI cannot track her down) Mwa ha ha ha ha.

OUR NEW DEMANDS AS OF 17TH JANUARY 2006 AT 11.10PM

By royal decree of King Wurzel of Salopshire and the order of the Third Nipple we hereby make the following demands for the safe return of Myfanwy

1) Carlisle Football Club must get a computer with INTERNET ACCESS that can look up WEATHER FORECASTS. It is not rocket science!

2) Brian Wake is to be neutered immediately to prevent further generations of footballer heaping woe on Shrewsbury Town football Club

3) Show us your money - ah yes, should the ransom reach a level acceptable for the order of the third nipple we will split the received cash 50/50 between the Supporter's Trusts of Shrewsbury Town Football Club and Carlisle Football Club

4) This is on the understanding the CUFC Supporters Trust will use part of the money to buy a BAROMETER so that CUFC can CHECK THE WEATHER FORECAST WHEN THE WEATHER IS GOING TO BE BAD TO STOP OTHER FANS WASTING HOURS OF THEIR TIME BECAUSE CUFC CAN'T MAKE A DECISION.

the auction if it still exists: http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=8752958754&ssPageName=ADME:L:LCA:UK:11

[amy]

The seller added to the description again

On 18-Jan-06 at 14:03:44 GMT, seller added the following information:

ANNOUNCEMENT!

Does anyone know a good vet?

Myfanwy has taken a turn for the worse and it is a cause of considerable concern. She just keeps mumbling, and then occasionally screaming out I AM THE ONLY GAY IN THIS VILLAGE much to the distaste of our neighbours.

Also, does anyone know a good way to stop a sheep bite from bleeding? We only wanted to stop her from eating next door's prize roses but she got more than a little feisty. I have tried warm water and a plaster but i think she may have severed a vein or something.

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On 18-Jan-06 at 17:03:47 GMT, seller added the following information:

SHROPSHIRE STAR IS SHEEP REVELATION SHOCK

Conflicting reports coming from Shrewbsury today suggest that Club officials have the situation in hand - but who will prove they have Myfanwy first? All will be made clear very very soon.

http://www.shropshirestar.com/show_artic...?aID=41419

Photos of Myfanwy will be released by her captors soon,, then you will know we have her and that the Star got it wrong. The only delay in posting images is needing permission from the RSPCA to post images of a sheep on ebay

Keep the campaign to save Myfanwy alive and you may well see her again. It is not long until February 14th and it would save postage costs for her to be delivered to you by the Shrewbsury fans.

The Myfanwy Liberation Front (MLF) have been very active in Shrewsbury recently bargaining for the release of Myfanwy - can the hostage takers hold their nerve?

More to the point, can they holds their Lamb Steaks?

I've never understood why Tiffany, Rolex, and others don't want their items sold on eBay, or why the average selling prices on eBay are so low.

[rose]