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Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?

  
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Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?
05-06-2006, 08:35 AM,
Post: #1
mandy Offline
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Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?
Quote:All I know is that I want this damned thing out of my house. Something is dreadfully wrong with this bear. I never used to believe in powers of darkness, but now I do. If you are willing to buy it, please let me know. I take no responsibility for what may happen afterwards and for god's sake don't keep it anywhere near children. The lingering presence is still in my house to some extent and I need to get the source out. THIS IS A LONG READ AND I AM SORRY BUT IT WAS THE ONLY WAY I COULD POUR IT OUT...

Quote:When I was a young child, I had a large stuffed toy bear, and named him "Baron"...

I went outside to pace under the sun, and started to notice odd scraps of ragged fabric stuck to some of the trees and brambles edging my property. One of them was recognizeable as part of one of my much older stuffed animals, from when I was a toddler. There must have still been a box of them tucked away somewhere. I went upstairs to look, and found only a decapitated Pooh in an otherwise empty cardboard box. Pooh's eyeless, mouthless head was on the seat of my car. The rest of the never-alive animals slowly came to view as I dug through some of the uncleared thickets, some of them with their heads seperated, some of them much worse. I saw the entrance to the crawlspace under the sideporch was open. This crawlspace leads directly to another crawlspace that goes to the basement. I saw some scraps of fur and stuffing laying in the entrance and was sure that I heard heavy, animal breathing deeper inside.

Inside, as the sun faded, the noises started again. I looked at some other pictures I had taken before and found one I hadn't noticed where Baron's eyes glowed a faint eerie red. Staying in the house for another night was a terrifying prospect. I was being forced to accept that some sort of evil supernatural entity was making a residence and destroying my life and my wellbeing. Looking in the downstairs bathroom mirror, my skin was almost china-pale, with dark veins showing through. The corruption that was overtaking the house was starting to get me as well. As I looked at my face in the mirror in the dim fluorescent light (I needed to change one of the pair and hadn't) the reflection slowly faded to grayish dark, and swirled into ornate patterns that gave way to a pure blackness that looked back at me through a pair of bright red eyes, the only thing I could see. I heard a horrible scream that might have been my own, as the lights went off through the entire house. The bathroom door is opposite the basement door, only a few feet to the other side and back a bit. I could hear slow shuffling sounds coming up them. My maglite was in my hand and my adrenaline was on full fight or flight mode. I chose fight.

I shone the light into the door and pulled it open. I swear to god I'm not crazy, and this is what I saw. There below me on the steps was Baron slowly walking up on two legs, one of my kitchen knives in his paws, scraps of other animals hanging off him. I yelled at the top of my lungs and shut the door, but it bounced back open. I was already several yards away, running upstairs for my guns. In my bedroom, the moonlight filtered through my curtains and I quickly grabbed my 870 and prepared to charge back down. I felt prickles on my neck and turned to see the eyes outside my window. They winked out into nothing with an unearthly moan and I left the house as fast as I could. I did not see 'Baron' on the way out.

the listing and complete description: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=6056014456

photo of devil teddy: http://www.televangelism.biz/unholy/porch3.jpg

bidding is up to US$320.00 for the possessed teddy bear
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05-06-2006, 03:31 PM,
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Anita Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?
Is Amy selling Todd????
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05-06-2006, 04:19 PM,
Post: #3
amy Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A B
Gen074
Blog
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05-07-2006, 02:32 AM,
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bargainbloodhound Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?
:xsmileybear: :rebear4: 1115
"Well, Jay was so giddy that someone named Jay was involved with this site we posted our first non-eBay listing in 3 years here at Lunarbid (we tried two items at Yahoo once upon a time, they bombed)" -Marie posting in a LunarBid thread at OTWA in 2005 wins the award for 'most moronic reason ever given for choosing a venue"

"thanks twat u must have nothing better 2 do. do u talk to all your members like that. will not be recomending your site.
best way to put it is TULIPTOOLS.COM IS REALLY SHIT. DONT JOIN." -pubescent owner of rinky dink off2auction.com in 2011
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05-07-2006, 07:15 AM,
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Anita Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?
"Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?"

What kind of box exactly?
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05-07-2006, 07:40 PM,
Post: #6
maryrussel Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A B
[quote author=Anita link=topic=3651.msg13603#msg13603 date=1146929490]
Is Amy selling Todd????
[/quote]

I'll offer $5,000 for Todd... Wink

That is Todd's ecommerce expertise, if he can guarantee to turn me into a successful netrepreneur like he is.
MY WEBSITES:

http://iwriteforu.com
http://weemotors.com


MY BLOGS:
http://theactivedog.blogspot.com/
http://blogs.allmusicsearch.com/allmusic...rite_for_u
Website
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05-07-2006, 09:01 PM,
Post: #7
dnc_ont Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A B
Quote:"Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?"

What kind of box exactly?

:o  And you called ME sick?!
Riotz Swimwear on eBay - Brazilian Bikinis on eBay
Brazilian Bikinis - Off-eBay site now open!
Thomas the Tank Engine
[url=http://ecommerce-info.ca]http://ecommerce-info
Website
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05-08-2006, 02:07 AM,
Post: #8
sneakymagenta Offline
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Re: Wanna Buy A Knife Wielding Murderous Satanic Teddy Bear That's Locked In A Box?
The bear has his own myspace page http://myspace.com/hauntedbear

Quote:Body type: 2' 4" / More to love!
Ethnicity: Other
OAI Moron Hall of Fame
<i>sell-thru is an irrelevant and illogical consideration.</i>
-KaRay, owner of WP giving selling advice, 2006

<i>the site was 'NOT' hacked but the little script that had recipes on had the link altered</i>
-Plunderhere Owner Mark Taylor after his site was hacked by a Chinese hacker gang, 2008

Some people have it like that, others don’t. I do.
-Probidscripts owner Spencer Osama Binweb Laden Ray bragging about his ability to scam the OAI without feeling any guilt, 2008.

How does an auction site get buyers?
-question asked at PSU by owner of auction site BidBeaver.ca, 2008

How do I get sales?
-question asked at PSU by online store owner, 2009.

I was told by my Tech. Support that my site dont really need SSL.. his servers
are well protected and that info your providing to join aint really top secret information

-owner of auction site TheTraderOutlet.com discussig his site's lack of basic security, 2009
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